Thursday, April 23, 2009

Sometimes you just have to smile

(I am quite aware that my last post was a total downer, so I really wanted to share my smiles. First of all, thanks to everyone for your kind comments and awesome encouragement. We made it though Spring Break and, I think I can speak for Sarah Lynn as well, we actually had a really good time. I just might make it through this whole mom thing.)

I've been so very, very happy lately, so I just thought I'd share just a few of the things that really make me smile. (In no particular order)

1. One super spunky six-year-old who loves, loves, loves her new PINK cowgirl boots from her grandma. Who wears them with everything - including bright-striped tights and cutie little dresses. And having same six-year-old keep losing her teeth. I keep telling her she won't have any left. It's so funny to look at her cute, little gapped smile. She is probably my source of my biggest smiles and giggles. She, quite simply, keeps me rolling almost non-stop.
Her newest tricks? She's learning to blow bubbles with her gum and she has a pretty killer english accent. We have to play Harry Potter, sing the "Puppet Show" ( and then pick and speak like all our characters. We have a grand time ol' chaps! It's so hilarious!!
2. Arrested Development. Watch it for 5 minutes and see if you don't just laugh until your face hurts.
3. Getting emails, blog comments, random phone calls or text messages or "friend requests" on Facebook from seemingly long-lost friends.
4. Having the warm sun spill across my face.
5. Knowing that no matter how crazy I may act, no matter how whacked I may seem, I have a husband who has dealt with people who are one thousand times more cooky than myself and he will always love, adore and take care of me.
6. Previews for 17again -- May I just say I love Zac Efron and I cannot wait to see this movie.
7. Realizing that all the laundry is washed, dried and put away. This REALLY makes me smile. tee hee
8. Looking at the picture on my phone -- it is currently a photo of my nephew, Caleb, with his tongue hanging out -- it's the funniest and cutest thing.
9. Just knowing that I am going to hear David Phelps again this weekend. Really, if you STILL have not heard him, you better!! (
10. Getting pumped for an awesome week of fun in AZ. Getting to see my family. Getting to see my friends. Having a BIG OL' Party with everyone I love.
11. And please don't forget, my favorite joke right now (it never seems to get old):
Q: "What does Snoop Dog use to get his whites their brightest?"
A: "Bleeee ach!"
**I'm giggling just writing this. hahahahhaha
My favorite part is when this really gets Christian and I talking "gangsta." It's the shizzle my dizzles. Oh, I am such a dork. But it's my bizaz. bah! ;)

Monday, April 6, 2009

100% inadequate, 100% of the time

Is this how motherhood feels? Honestly?
I was terrible at being single. I was terrible at trying to date. Now, somehow (heaven only knows), I snagged myself the most amazing man on the planet and I am terrible at being a wife. I am terrible at being a mother.
At least this is how I feel at 3:30 in the morning... and a six thirty in the morning, when I haven't slept at all during the night... and again at ten o'clock at night, when I am laying in bed wondering why I'm not sleeping...
Christian reassures me, probably 1000 times a day (poor guy, what has he gotten himself into?!), that I am doing great, that I am handling this drastic life-change so well; but that just doesn't satisfy this lingering feeling of inadequacy. It's not that I feel like I am failing, but I just have no idea who thought I could actually do this!!
Case in point:
This is no nanny gig. When six o'clock rolls around and I have spent an entire day having a blast with a vibrant, spunky and energetic six-year old who has worn me completely into the ground, there is no handing her off to mom and dad and climbing into bed so I can have enough energy to fly kites, run around the lake, play tag and walk around museums the next day. I am mom. I am mom. I am mom.
I feel like this week is going to be my ultimate "mommy" test. If I mess up this week... I don't know what "messing up" would entail, but... I am terrified of whatever that may be!!
My friends, pray for me. Pray for unsuspecting Sarah Lynn. Pray for Christian, my oh-so supportive husband.
AND come play, if you can. We'd love for you to come by!

Some things just don't change

So... apparently if you can't sleep BEFORE you get married, most likely, you still won't be able to sleep AFTER you get married. (I'm sorry if I am stealing all the hope from you insomniac singles like I once was.) Now I'm just an insomniac wife and mother who wonders how she functions throughout the day and why she just can't sleep at night!!
(yes, notice the time of the posting... 3:30 AM. this sucks!)